RE: UKNM: this may be a false alarm, but....

[James Tarin]

I actually heard it was much more dangerous:


Win a Holiday will re-write your hard drive. It will also make you fall in love with a 

penguin and give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your

gas tank and shave off both your eyebrows while dating your girlfriend behind your back and billing the dinner and hotel room to your Discover card.


It will seduce your grandmother. It does not matter if she is dead, such is the power of Win a Holiday, it reaches out beyond the grave to sully those things we hold most dear.


It moves your car randomly around parking lots so you can't find it. It will kick your dog. It will leave libidinous messages on your boss's voice mail in your voice! It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather

interesting shade of mauve.


Win a Holiday will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet seat up. It will make a batch of Methamphetamine in your bathtub and then leave bacon cooking on the stove while it goes out to chase gradeschoolers with your new snowblower.