FLASH: TAN - Junk Mail - FWD Joke (Ignore if you are busy)

[Quinn Merio]

If you have no time or patience for this joke, please delete now!


I thought this was amusing... a reminder for everyone who has ever passed along a hoax virus message. But I had to share.... well cause I work alone mostly and get bored...


Sorry about the clutter  d:-}


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WARNING, VIRUS ALERT...


If you see a message on the boards with a subject line of "Badtimes," 

delete it immediately WITHOUT reading it. This is the most dangerous 

virus yet.


It will re-write your hard drive. Not only that, but it will scramble 

any disks that are even close to your computer <up to 20 feet>. It 

will recalibrate your refrigerator's coolness setting so all your ice cream

melts and milk curdles. It will demagnetize the strips on all your 

credit cards, reprogram your ATM access code, screw up the tracking on 

your VCR and use subspace field harmonics to scratch any CDs you try 

to play.


It will give your ex-boy/girlfriend your new phone number. It will 

program your phone autodial to call only your mother's number.

It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous and terrifying to behold. 

It will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. It will drink all your beer. 

It will hide your car keys when you are late for work and interfere with 

your car radio so that you hear 1940's hits and static while stuck in 

traffic.


It will give you nightmares about circus midgets. It will replace your 

shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all while dating your 

current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel 

rendezvous to your Visa card.


It will rewrite your back-up files, changing all your active verbs to 

passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings which 

grossly change the interpretation of key sentences.


"Badtimes" will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet 

seat up and leave the hairdryer plugged in dangerously close to a full 

bathtub.


It will wantonly remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and 

pillows, and refill your skim milk with whole. "Badtimes" is an evil 

virus conceived by evil people. It is also a rather interesting shade 

of mauve.


These are just a few signs. Be very, very afraid. PLEASE FORWARD THIS 

MESSAGE TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!!

>




_______________________

Q u i n n   I   M e r i o

Graphic Designer

N Square Systems Development Corp.



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