UKNM: Fwd: Christmas Greetings from breathe

[Ian Tester]

the funniest, and slightly saddest email i've had for a long time. . .


i


------- Start of forwarded message -------


Subject: Christmas Greetings from breathe

To:

breathe_usersbreathe [dot] com

From: The breathe team <

newsletterbreathe [dot] com

>

Date: 21 Dec 2000 15:58:34 GMT


ANNOUNCEMENT:


Michael Horrocks and Steven Anthony Pearson have been appointed as

administrators to breathe.com Limited to manage its affairs, business and

property as its agents.


While the administrators of breathe look for a buyer for the business,

breathe will continue to trade. New material will continue to appear on the

web and wap sites and breathe services such as SMS and the mail centre will

still be available.


Further developments will be announced as they occur.



EDITOR'S VIEW:


Ah the season of goodwill. Yup, there's a Dickensian frost decorating our

windows, carol singers on the icy doorstep, chestnuts roasting in the

hearth, and peace on Earth.


Okay, maybe that's a slight exaggeration. As you've already read, breathe is

enjoying a tumultuous festive season! Personally, I've gone straight into

Scrooge mode. And I highly recommend it. There's a twisted satisfaction to

be felt when you tell people you're "not doing Christmas this year".


Besides, isn't this season meant to be all about fellowship rather than

commercialism?

Even though you're being pressured to part with your hard-earned cash this

month, take a moment to think about the fact that the Internet is a great

source of fellowship... it has expanded the concept of community to include

everyone. It's a platform for all creeds and colours, bringing us together

to learn more about the world we share. And while you're thinking about

that, here's an advert:


*********


Get 12 issues of Front Magazine for only �24 when you subscribe through

breathe. That's a saving of over �8 on the normal newsstand price of �32.40.

Alternatively you can get 6 issues for �13.


To subscribe simply phone 01454 642465 or email

frontcisubs [dot] co [dot] uk

 and quote

reference frontbreathe1.


*********


Sorry. I couldn't resist. Besides, everyone likes to save money at

christmas. The breathe team is particularly eager to do so at the moment!



A FRUGAL CHRISTMAS


If you want to join in with our belt-tightening exercises, here are a few

skinflint gift ideas:


Surprise Chocolate Egg - A chocolate and a toy! An entertaining bit of

plastic, requiring only the mental aptitude of an amoeba to assemble. Eat

the chocolate yourself though, unless the gift is for someone really

special.


Fast Food Christmas - Make a gift from the toys fast food outlets use to

bribe your kids into eating their junk. Spray with furniture polish or

something to disguise the stench of burgers and fries.


Christmas Cracker - We've all done this. Carefully untie one end of a

Christmas cracker and then tip the gift out. What none of us have done yet,

is to then wrap it up and hope that Aunty Edith wanted a plastic hair clip

or aluminium nail clippers from Santa this year.


Festive Beauty - Do people buy you those soap and beauty sets because they

love you? Or because you're ugly and you smell? You wash but not THAT

much... so use last year's unused stock as this year's gifts. Try sending it

back to the person who sent it to you.


Or, alternatively, give everyone a hug this Christmas. It's free and no one

can argue about its 'meanness' value. Unless, gasp, they think Christmas is

a materialistic time of year. Surely not!



LET'S MAKE SWEET MUSIC


It's no good. I can't keep the Scrooge act up. I'm going to have to offer

you something rather splendid for Xmas:


In conjunction with Front Magazine and Freedom Card, breathe is offering THE

prize for all you budding DJ's. You'll find the competition at

http://www.breathe.com/entertainment/music/frontcomp.html.

The winner will get a one day DJ or music technology course with POINT BLANK

(London). After this the winner will spend one day in the Timeless Studios

in London laying down a track, working with a Top Ten record production

team. The finished track will then be reviewed by DECODE record's A&R man,

with a view to signing!


If this isn't enough, the winner will also receive the GEMINI SCRATCHMASTER

SET, complete with two decks, mixer, headphones and leads!


Now that is what I call a COOL prize. There's more though! If you email the

competition URL to five friends you'll receive a �10 voucher to spend at

www.theclothesstore.com

For full details visit http://breathe.com/lifestyle/music/frontcomp.html

At least you'll be able to buy a decent pullover instead of having to wear

the monstrosity your Aunty knits you for Christmas.



FUN FESTIVITIES


That's it for this newsletter. There's a guy on Oxford Street selling hot

chestnuts and I'm off to buy some. Much tastier than humbugs!


Merry Christmas and happy New Year folks!



Mark Hodder

Editor

www.breathe.com





___________________________________________

It's amazing what happens when you breathe.

www.breathe.com


------- End of forwarded message -------


Ian Tester, Business Accelerator, EMAP Digital

Exmouth House, Pine Street, London EC1R 0LJ, UK

T (020) 7868 7574 M (07880) 557692 E

iantbreathe [dot] com

___________________________________________

It's amazing what happens when you breathe.

www.breathe.com



~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     ADictive � online advertising for everyone


With ADictive's 120 content related categories to choose from,

companies of ALL sizes can now target their online advertising,

reduce wastage and save ����s. Result!


Click through to http://www.adictive.com to find out more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  To unsubscribe or change your list settings go to

http://www.chinwag.com/uk-netmarketing or

helpchinwag [dot] com